Why do you need to scan my ID, Mr. Dispensary Receptionist Guy? The bouncer at your fancy facility already checked my driver’s license and confirmed I’m over 21. You’re really making this whole “legal weed” buying thing very par-annoying. Yeah! That’s “paranoid” and “annoying” put together because those are the kind of words you come up with when you’re high. So, what gives? Why do I need to be in your database?! I have a job, you know? … A family! Are you going to use this visit against me? Is there a background check I have to pass? Will future employers find this on my record? Shit! I should have never come here! I don’t need weed gummies or pastries. How the hell would I know what types of marijuana strains are conducive to the type of high I prefer? I just wanna get high, man. I don’t want to fill out a form and answer a few questions like, “Is this your first time here?” What are you, a cop?! You can keep your dirty $10-Off-for-First-Time-Customer certificate! I’m going back to my weed guy!
I Saw You is an anonymous “man on the street” column. Email your rants and raves about co-workers or any badly behaving citizens to
iS*****@me*******.com
, or send to 380 S. First St, San Jose, 95113. Submissions should stick to about 100 words.
